Tracee, Death to Cars

Sunday I went about 30 minutes north and played in a concert. When I was done, I put the girls in the truck, plugged in the DVD player, and turned the key. Nothing happened except the DVD player went off. I turned it again. Zilch.

I know nothing about cars and mechanical stuff, but I figured the battery was dead...so I went back in to the concert and asked a lady if anyone could help me jump my truck. A nice man with a crazy toddler who wasn't digging the concert to begin with said he would help me...as long as I had cables. Amazingly enough, I knew where they were!

I jumped in the bed of the truck and got my bag of cables out. I was wearing concert black of course, and when I got out of the bed, it was concert black with grey smudges. The choir director came out to help, too. We set up the cables, and when I turned the key...nothing happened. Still. So, I called AAA to send me a tow truck, and my husband to come and get us in his car.

My husband, of course, was busy yelling at the Bengals, but he and the tow truck guy arrived within minutes of each other. They hoisted my truck onto his truck, and we followed it down the highway. I snapped some cute pics of it on the way.

An hour later, I decided I needed to go to Walmart. I took my husband's car and Story. Story and I were having a rousing game of "Find the letter A on road signs" when the car started acting funny, losing speed. I down shifted, but it wasn't helping, and I could smell something weird. So, I pulled over to the side of the road amidst a cloud of smoke which I prayed was just road dust. Unfortunately it was coming out of the hood, so my hopes were dashed.

I told Story to hold on as I unbuckled, but in the excitement, I dropped my cell phone under the seat. You know, that one place you can't really reach from the front or the back? That's where it was. You can imagine me now...burning car, me hanging upside down from the drivers seat half out in the highway looking for my phone, and Story in the back saying, "Mommy, what's that smell?"

I finally grabbed the phone and popped the hood just as a couple pulled up in front of me. I ran around the side to get Story out as the guy said, "You okay??"

"Uh, no!" I yelled from the shoulder.

He said, "Well, we smelled you a couple miles back...is it a fire?"

I wasn't sure, so we popped the hood, and in a few short minutes realized that I'd burnt the clutch out in the car. I reached for my cell to call my husband (who is at home with no vehicle, remember), and then realized that I had no service. An old couple pulled up behind me and swore that they had service, but when I tried to use their phone, it wouldn't ring through.

So, old couple drove over the hill to call my husband, and young couple played with Story while I sat and silently freaked out. I mean, really, what are the odds I'd kill both cars in one day???

I made young couple leave (they were really tired, I could tell), and old couple came back to tell me they'd gotten a hold of my husband, but he said his car was tore up. (Uh, yeah! LOL)

Several other people stopped to check on me, but I shooed them on. I figured out that if I stood on the passenger seat, and held my phone on the roof of the car, that I could send texts. So I started sending them frantically. I found out that Rob and my neighbor were coming to get me. Then, a cop stopped and tried to talk me in to calling a wrecker, and Story asked him if he was taking us to jail.

Finally, my husband got there with my neighbor. He drove the car back while I rode with my neighbor.

The next morning, I called Enterprise to "come pick me up." I also called my mechanic and gave him the bad news: not only did he have to squeeze my truck in to his schedule, he also had to make room for Rob's car.

So, if anyone's interested in donating to the "Get Tracee back on the road fund," just put your number in the comments section and I'll give you a call and tell you where to send the check. =)

The First Grade Blues

So, Ivy has spent one month in first grade....one. long. month.

The little good girl I had last year in Kindergarten is long gone, and in her place is a whiny, reluctant 6 year old teenager!!

How, you ask? I think it revolves around her lazy disposition and spelling tests, but we'll see.

First, she despises working. She refuses to do homework. I sit with her and try to encourage her to do every problem or question. I start out being the nice supportive mommy, gently coaxing answers out of her and encouraging her to write neatly.

After an hour of this (and we've only completed 2 questions!!), I decide that I have to get something done! So, I leave her to it, refusing TV, snacks, and drinks until it's complete. When she starts chewing on her pencil or playing a game with her crayons, I step in a up the threat level.

Of course, 10 minutes later, I'm offering drinks and candy if she will just finish two more problems!!!

One evening, I swear she spent two and a half hours writing twelve spelling words twice each. That's 6.25 minutes spent on each word....

In the height of my homework frustrations, I find a worksheet under the coffee table one evening. After I study it, I realize it is this week's spelling words. I call another 1st grade mom, and she thinks the worksheet was supposed to be turned in on Tuesday. It's Saturday.

When I lay it in front of Ivy and ask her why it was under the coffee table, she confesses that she put it there. "Why?????" I ask. (I'd like to tell you I asked in my nice voice, but that would be a lie.)

Ivy says, "Mommy, I want to go back to Kindergarten. This first grade stuff is just too much work."

So, after making her swear to give it to her teacher and apologize when the weekend was over, I contemplated her statement. True, there was a lot more work...and the infamous Tracee-stress-inducers called spelling tests (I mean, it would be so much easier if I could just take them for her!!) But, I hated to tell her this, it was only going to get worse. I mean, if she couldn't copy twenty-four words in less than two hours, how was she ever going to do 50 math problems?? And heaven forbid she would ever have to write a paper!!

I'm not sure what the future holds for her and her inability to focus on her homework....all I know is I have only two short years to figure it out before I have two homework-skipping time-wasting divas on my hands....